manifestos

The Effing Librarian Manifesto

I am absolutely quitting my blog; I'm going back to being someone with no feed subscribers (currently over ten million) and no tweet followers (some guy named Mel); I'll be a regular guy. I will go quietly.

So, please, for the love of Mike, can all the librarians stop baiting me for the next three weeks.. just stop doing dumb shit so I don't have to rant about it. I know I can't expect regular people to cease and desist, but can't all the librarians just take the month off?

The Darien Statements on the Library and Librarians is what I mean. Please just stop. Stop. Stop. Stop defining or declaring. Stop. Because if you don't stop, you'll just get me started.

Because the.effing.librarian can declare shit, too. But the.effing.librarian is leaving soon, so I'll keep it short:

"The Effing Librarian Statement: Libraries and Librarians help you do all kinds of shit that might somehow involve books, but not always."

And if you want the bumper sticker version: "Librarians help you do shit."

There are no grandiose claims of preserving the freedom or enabling the pursuit or preserving the integrity of anything. Just helping people to do or find the shit that they need or want.

So take your pick: one has a bunch of statements and roles to memorize, and the other lets you stick the word "shit" on the back of your car. I know which one I'd pick.

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